uMthunywa
UKUFAKA umuthi wothando bekuyinto okwaziwa ukuthi yenziwa ngabesifazane abasuka bafune amadoda abo abheke bona bodwa. Muva nje kodwa kuvela ukuthi labesilisa bangenile kulumkhuba wokudlisa abesifazane.
Abelaphi bendabuko bathi amadoda angena ephuma ezindaweni zabo ezodinga okokudlisa abesifazane ukuze bangabheki abanye, babagcine bengababo bodwa.
Isangoma esesileminyaka sisebenza ngemithi yesintu futhi esiyingcitshi uma kukhulunywa ngemithi ‘‘yothando’’, uNkosikazi Hlengiwe
“Godlulwandle” Dladla weBluff, utshele leli phephandaba ukuthi zinengi izizatho ezibekwa ngabesilisa abasuka bezodinga okokudlisa abesifazane.
Imvama yikuthi bangaliwa, abesifazane bafune bona kuphela.
“Abesilisa laba bafika befuna isidliso. Akusibo nje abatshadileyo kuphela abadlisa amakhosikazi abo kodwa inqwaba yilaba abajolayo, umuntu othole intombi ayithanda kakhulu bese ekhetha ukuyidlisa. Ngabesilisa abangamakhasitoma ami kakhulu. Abanye bafika sebesazi ukuthi amakhosikazi ayaganga kodwa ngenxa yothando, bafune ukuwanika umuthi angaphindi abheke abanye,” kutsho uGodlulwandle.
Eqhubeka uthe isidliso sabesifazane sifakwa ekudleni, izinhlanga zasemzimbeni, izinhlanga zesitho sangasese lezinye izindlela.
“Umuntu ozodinga ukudlisa owesifazane awuvele umnike nje, uqala ubheke izizatho zakhe bese ucela lasedlozini. Kuyenzeka omunye afune ukwehlukanisa umuntu lomyeni wakhe, afune ukumxhaphaza ebona izinto alazo noma afune ukumthithibalisa. Akubi lula kanjalo ngoba idlozi lisebenza ngento ehlanzekileyo,” kutsho uGodlulwandle.
Eqhubeka uthe kulezimpawu ezilula lezijwayelekileyo ezibonakalayo kowesifazane odlisiweyo. “Umuntu uthatha izinqumo ezinkulu ngasese angawutsheli umdeni. Uxolela ngokwedluleyo noma kungasafanele, uhlala elovalo noma elandelwa ngowesilisa. Kuyenzeka omunye ahlale exabana labo bonke abantu abasondela kuye abone sengathi bazomthatha. Into ebalulekileyo yikuthola usizo isidliso sibulawe.
“Akufanelanga umuntu ayohlanziswa isidliso singakabulawa ngaphakathi ngoba singaqhuma simbulale loba simgulise,” kutsho uGodlulwandle.
Ephetha uthe akukho okulicala ngokuvuselela uthando kumuntu omthandayo lolenhloso ngaye kodwa kuyawabanga amabhadi ukudlisa umuntu bese umtshiya.
“Uma umtshiya umuntu kudingeka uqale uyobulala isidliso,” kutsho uGodlulwandle. — Isolezwe
